Sandbagging

Nature is where it’s at.  I always feel good in nature even though it’s not always a comfortable place to be.  There is something so calming about not being needed.

Everything functions with or without you.

It is so unlike our little bubbles we manipulate and call life.  Funny how we introduce drama and plight without even knowing it.  It’s like we thrive on it, need the adventure to keep ourselves busy and distracted.

No one makes me do anything yet I always feel the need to put a deadline on myself.  A challenge for this or a challenge for that, you must write 5 blog posts in 5 five days.  Blah blah blah.  Why do I keep putting this pressure on myself?  So I can grow?  So I can change and become someone better?  Will I?  Or will I continue to use it to really accomplish nothing.  I have the ability to do anything I want and yet I chose to do nothing with the premise of something great.  I am sandbagging at life.  Nothing changes or grows without movement and whether that movement is forward or backward doesn’t matter.  Stagnation happens when you are sitting still and I feel like all I do anymore is sit still.  I need to find my drive.  Something to propel me forward.

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